Well, love, it seems like someone you bump into now and then is wondering why you’ve been scarcer than a decent cup of tea in America. They can’t wrap their head around the fact that you’ve got more private matters to deal with than a royal scandal. Once you’ve sorted out your own Eastenders-level drama, you’ll be more than chuffed to have a chinwag with them, again. And for a lucky charm, try a horseshoe. Just remember, it’s only lucky if it doesn’t land on your foot. And if it does, might I suggest a lucky number for you? It’s 999, for the ambulance you’ll probably need.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!