Your mates and work chums seem to be crowding around you like pigeons to a Greggs pasty, begging for your pearls of wisdom. Brace yourself, you might have to toss aside your own to-do list like last week’s fish and chips paper. You may not fancy yourself the big cheese, the head honcho, the bloody genius of the gang, but these lot seem to think you’ve got the brains they’re sorely lacking. Your lucky charm? A soggy biscuit. Why? Because even at its worst, it’s still a biscuit, innit? A little reminder that even when you’re a bit of a mess, you’re still bloody brilliant.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!