You’re running around like a blue arsed fly, ain’t ya? Why are you letting your jam-packed schedule get in the way of a bit of cheeky flirtation and a chinwag down the pub? Ever thought about delegating some of your faffing about? For the love of the Queen’s corgis, you need to let loose, chum up with your mates and act like a big kid again. It’s about time you stopped being such a boring sod and had a laugh! And here’s a funny little nugget for ya, your lucky charm is a rubber chicken. Why? Because nothing says “I’m ready to take life less seriously” like a bloomin’ rubber chicken! So, stick that in your pocket and giggle every time you give it a squeeze. It’s about as useful as a chocolate teapot but at least it’ll give you a chuckle.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!