Even if you find your job as thrilling as a Sunday afternoon game of bingo, there’s nothing like kicking back with a bunch of nutters who could make a funeral seem like a comedy show. Ditching the grindstone for a bit will leave you feeling as fresh as a daisy in a garden of manure, and you’ll return to your desk with enough energy to light up Blackpool Illuminations. You’re trying to juggle your personal and work life like a one-legged man at an arse-kicking contest. Now, your lucky charm, darling, is a rubber duck. Yes, a bloody rubber duck. Why? Well, because it’s as absurd as your attempts to balance work and life. It might not help, but at least it’ll give you a laugh.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!