Blimey, sunshine, it looks like your life’s about to do a proper U-turn, straight out of a loony bin and into a fairy tale. You’re about to bump into a right sort who’s either gonna be your new mate or your next big love interest – either way, prepare for your days to be sparklier than the Queen’s knickers. Your love life is set to be as joyful as a streaker at a footie match, with two hearts and minds clicking together like a pair of randy rabbits. And you, you soppy git, you’re about to go soppy, pledging your undying love like you’re on a second-rate reality TV show. Best bit? The end of the day is top notch for shaking on it, and no, that’s not a euphemism. Lucky charm: A rubber duck. Yeah, you heard me right, a bloody rubber duck. Stick it in your pocket and see if it brings you any fortune, or at least a good laugh. Just don’t let it squeak in public, you don’t want to be known as the nutter with a quacking trouser pocket, do ya?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!