Well, ya cheeky bugger, got itchy fingers for a bit of DIY, have we? Slapping some paint on the walls, flogging the old gaff, or maybe even splashing out on a new one – that’s what the stars have got lined up for you. Blighty’s got a housing crisis they say, but you, my friend, are about to treat it like a game of Monopoly. That refurb you’ve been putting off? Now’s the time, mate. No more crying poverty, it’s time to pick up the tool belt and channel your inner Nick Knowles. And you, you single pringle, you’re as irresistible as a chip shop curry after a night on the lash. You won’t need to lift a finger – they�ll be flocking to you like pigeons to a bag of chips. So get ready for some action, cause it’s about to get hotter than a summer in Skegness. Lucky charm for you: a rusty old spanner. It’s about as useful as a chocolate teapot, but it just might win you the lottery… or help you unblock the loo. Either way, it’s a win.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!