Well, you’ve been handed a right royal load of codswallop, haven’t you? And you didn’t even nod your head yes to it. You’re probably wishing you could flip the script, but guess what? That’s as likely as a vegan at a butcher’s convention. Instead, chin up, and focus on being the crutch for those who’ve had their knickers in a twist thanks to some dodgy decision or a law that’s about as fair as a two-legged donkey in a race. Lucky charm: A four-leaf clover. Find one and you’re golden. But remember, it’s about as useful as a chocolate teapot if you don’t believe in its luck.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!