Listen up, darling, you’re about to get schooled in the art of social survival. Your antics in tricky situations and your reactions to people you’d rather see on a milk carton than in your space, well, they’re the real expose on the tabloid of your life. Now, you’ve got this irksome colleague, haven’t you? The sort who you wouldn’t piss on if they were on fire? Well, darling, it’s about time you started grinning and bearing it. You’re never going to be besties sending each other emojis, but at least you won’t be duking it out over the photocopier. And here’s your lucky charm, darling. A rubber duck. That’s right, a rubber duck. Because when you’re up the creek without a paddle, at least you won’t be alone. Plus, it’s a cracker of a conversation starter at those dull office parties!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!