Well, brace yourself, darling. Your chances of trotting down a new path are as vast as the Queen’s hat collection. You’ve got more liberty now to do as you blimmin’ well please – and by that, I mean you can finally tell those high-maintenance ninnies to shove it. If you’re all muddled up about something, darling, don’t just stand there like a lemon. Get a second opinion! Unless it’s from your ex. Then you’re just asking for trouble. Now, here’s your lucky charm – it’s a penny. Why a penny, you ask? Well, it’s because you’re too cheap for a four-leaf clover. Happy hunting, sweetheart.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!