Well, blimey! You’re about to embark on a new lovey-dovey escapade, ain’t ya? But, crikey, your other half’s having a bit of a mare understanding your cockney rhubarb, aren’t they? With your diary chock-a-block with everything but a quick snog in the park, it’s no wonder your beloved thinks you’re playing silly beggars. Your frequent no-shows could be mistaken for you being a right unaffectionate pillock. So, put on your thinking cap, you daft sod, and plan a bit of slap and tickle for tonight. Give that blossoming love affair a bit of a how’s your father, why don’t ya? And remember, your lucky charm is a four-leaf clover. Not that it’s gonna help with your communication skills, but at least you can wave it around while you’re mumbling your excuses!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!