Bloody hell, your bonkers ideas are gonna yank the chains of the bigwigs! Mind you, they’re looking down from those lofty perches, but don’t be fooled, they ain’t your chums, mate. Your true pals are the ones who’ll tell you straight up, “You’re a twit!” There’s a world of difference between a pat on the back and a kick up the arse, so don’t get them muddled! And for your lucky charm, how about a four-leaf clover? Though knowing your luck, it’ll probably be three leaves and a cabbage!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!