Listen up, love. You’re gritting your teeth like a bulldog chewing on a wasp, trying to find the silver lining in this certified pig’s ear. At the same time, you’re finally realising you’ve got to chuck some of these memories into the bin of history. No need for tears or a violin, just drop it like a hot scone. A change of view will perk you up, even if your travel plans are currently as limited as a hermit crab in a jam jar. Your lucky phrase, believe it or not, is “don’t let the door hit you on the way out.” A word to the wise, though – don’t say it to your boss unless you fancy a stint on the dole.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!