Well, you’ve got more charm than a snake oil salesman at a health convention, and it’s bloody working wonders on everyone you meet. You’re so chuffed with how your communal kerfuffles are chugging along, you’re about to pop your buttons. Who’d have thought you’d pull a blinder like this, eh? Not you, that’s for sure. Now you can gander back at your recent life with those rose-tinted specs firmly in place, and maybe you’ll realise, you’re not as daft as you look. Here’s a lucky phrase for you: “Even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while.” Might not seem like much, but with your track record, you’re the squirrel, mate. So keep that in mind, and remember, your lucky number is zero – because that’s the amount of tosses everyone gives about your triumphs. And remember, a little charm goes a long way, unless it’s a charm bracelet – then it just makes you look like a right muppet.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!