Listen up, mate, you’ve been fannying about with this blasted task for donkey’s years, havn’t ya? Well, pull your finger out and get a wiggle on, before the Queen’s speech, for goodness sake. You might actually finish the blighter, and lord knows, miracles do happen! Who knows, you might even do something worth a mention in the local rag. And tonight, give it a rest, will ya? No one likes a try-hard. And here’s a little nugget of wisdom for ya: “The harder you chuck, the luckier your duck.” So, find yourself a rubber ducky, preferably one that’s seen better days, and chuck it out the window. Just mind you don’t hit the neighbour’s cat, we wouldn’t want another ‘lucky escape’ now, would we?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!