Right, listen up sunshine, it’s bloody fantastic to be a bit of a dreamer, to let your brain fart out all those creative juices. But, in between your tea sipping and biscuit dunking, remember to keep your feet on the sodding ground, in the here and now, in the gritty reality of your daily circus. Make sure you take a good gander at the facts, you know, those annoying bits of truth that could potentially save your arse from a world of trouble. Don’t just dive headfirst into big decisions like a drunken lemming off a cliff, alright? And here’s a little nugget of luck for the day: your lucky colour is neon green, just like that regrettable curry you had last night. Wear it, own it, but for the love of God, don’t eat it again!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!