Don’t let some posh piece of parchment give you the hump, darling. A bit of electronic chitter-chatter that’s got your knickers in a twist probably wasn’t meant for your peepers in the first place. Later on, some juicy tittle-tattle will kick off a right old to-do, leading to an end result that’s more intriguing than a soap opera cliffhanger. P.S. Keep an eye out for a lucky rubber duck, sweetie. It’s rumoured to be more reliable than your horoscope. Mind you, so is a broken clock!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!