‘Ello, ‘ello, ‘ello, you’re here again, are you? Well, let’s have a bit of a chinwag about your starry fate, shall we? If you’ve taken on more duties than a one-legged man at an arse-kicking contest, all while tackling the hellish holiday obligations, you’d better put a cork in the stress and tension before your nerves start jangling like a set of cheap Christmas lights. And don’t think you can just bung on a plaster and hope for the best, sunshine, you’ve got to keep your cool like the Queen at a garden party. Looking at the future of a new group project, are we? Well, break out the bloody tea and biscuits, it’s time to lay down some solid groundwork. Don’t be a wally and think you can just skate by on your charm and good looks. You’ve got to build a strong foundation like a proper British builder-arse crack out and all. Now, get a wriggle on! Oh, and here’s your lucky charm: a pair of knackered old socks. I know, not exactly a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but they’ve got more chance of bringing you luck than that dodgy horoscope you read in the paper this morning. And remember, it’s not about the smell, it’s about the magic within… or something like that, I’m just making this up as I go along.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!