SO, WHO IS LORRAINE KELLY?

THAT MAKE-UP BAG

Many years ago, when Lorraine Kelly first appeared on ITV’s breakfast television you would have been forgiven for asking yourself, “who the blazes are that?” The general public was used to middle-class presenters with posh accents and a somewhat superior demeanour. But Loraine was just the opposite. She was down to earth and so naturally charming many might have wondered whether she even used a makeup bag.

Lorraine has both her Sun and Moon in Saggy, a fiery combo that ensures very few dares put her down. Sagittarius is a courageous if somewhat extreme sign, and having both her Sun and Moon in that Astro placement ensures she is well… courageous and extreme. This lady certainly steps up to the plate with hyper-awareness and a capacity to stay focused. In fact, Saturn in Capricorn ensures she will never go beyond the boundaries of what is necessary and consequently, she rarely gets it wrong, even in dire circumstances.

A WEE BONNIE GIRL

A bonnie girl born in Glasgow in the late fifties, her origins were working class. Her grandmother thought she should have been put up for adoption due to the fact she was the wee daughter of two broke teenagers from the Gorbals area. She lived with her young parents in a tiny house with an outside toilet, but right from the start, little Lorraine was different; she was ambitious. She wanted to study Russian she wanted to travel the world. She was so determined to become a journalist she turned down a place at university to join the East Kilbride News at seventeen. The now sixty-two-year-old has always been adept at managing her career. A fairy godmother blessed her with Mr Mercury in Scorpio, an intense vibe that resulted in competent communication skills and a capacity to rise up the ladder of success without a ladder in her stockings.

Notwithstanding her popularity, she is stunned by her own fame. She told the Guardian she would be toddling around the supermarket with her hubby, and people would come up to her and start chatting with her. Hubby would just stand there and then say “How do we know them?’” and she would answer “We don’t!”

EVERYBODY’S BEST FRIEND

It is not surprising folks gravitate towards the chirpy presenter; she appears to be everybody’s best friend. But, beyond the bubbly exterior, a competent human is determined to say it like it is. Lorraine is lucky, she has the help of a comfortable Venus in Libra to smooth things out. Yet, make no mistake, she gets the truth even if it means calling one of her guests “A Twit”. Former MP Neil Parish was the object of her outrage after resigning from his post. He had been caught watching pornography in the House of Commons. She delighted her audience when she blatantly asked him, “What were you thinking?

Most of the time, she poses her questions with a gentle attitude; she was certainly gentle when overcome by soft blushes during the George Clooney interview; her fans love that sympathetic approach but have long cottoned on she is no pushover, Piers Morgan once said she was “an iron fist in a velvet glove!” Yes, Lorraine can be tough. She told the Guardian about the rigours of her documentary “Return to Dunblane”. She said, “it was something I really wanted to do. What the families did there to change the law was a remarkable achievement – they made something positive out of something unimaginably horrific”. Yet, Lorraine’s magic is her ability to quickly switch from human tragedies to grandma’s issues with knitting patterns.

WATCH YOUR WORDS

So, is it true that this lady can do no wrong? Well, referring yet again to her double Saggy combo, competitors might need to watch their words cos she won’t watch hers if moralistic judgements rain on her parade. She wants to swim through life freestyle. She has a broad mind. She deems herself a true-blue broadcaster who pushes the right message as best she can. And the right message equals human rights.

She once said, “I’ve got a lot of pals who happen to be trans or they happen to be whatever … who cares?! They’re all just human and that’s a part of who they are.”

“People should just be a bit more tolerant because trans people are currently going through, I think, what gay people went through. It’s a hard road, it really is.” When asked who she would like to play her if a movie was made of her life, she answered the drag queen Lawrence Chaney. and it is more than doubtful she was joking

SO, WHO IS SHE?

So, who is the real Lorraine Kelly? Is she a plane, is she a UFO, is she a superwoman? She once insisted she was just pretending to be that lovable “Lorraine person”. In fact, she was so adamant about “not really being Lorraine Kelly” that she avoided paying a tax bill of £1.2 million. Work that one out.

We more than suspect that no matter who she believes, she really is her Sun sign and will continue to stoke the flames of success. No matter her critics, no matter her homebody approach, she is the ruler of her life, and woe betides anyone who believes differently.