Cor blimey! You’re about to become a master in the art of lending an ear to the drivel others jabber on about. You’ve got a workmate or local busybody who can’t string two words together to save their life. Even your own flesh and blood are tongue-tied, can’t make neither heads nor tails of what they’re trying to convey. You’re the one stuck in the middle, like a jam sandwich, trying to make sense of it all. It’s a right kerfuffle, but keep your wits about you, ’cause paying attention and finding compromise is key to avoid getting your knickers in a twist. Your lucky phrase for the week? ‘Bob’s your uncle.’ It’s about as close as you’ll get to a stroke of genius in this circus. Remember, in this comedy of errors, Bob might be the only one who knows his arse from his elbow.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!