Oi, you’ve been chucking about the old wonga like it’s going out of fashion, ain’t ya? Let me guess, it was that shiny new thingamajig that had you whipped into a tizzy, even though your wallet was screaming bloody murder, right? Well, now you’re up the financial creek without a paddle, ain’t ya? Time to put on your big boy pants and sort out this cash calamity. Your lucky phrase for today is “Penny wise, pound foolish.” It’s as much use as a chocolate teapot, but it might give you a laugh.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!