Blow your ears out with cotton buds, darling, because if you don’t start paying attention to the claptrap spouted by your so-called ‘superiors’ and those office monkeys you call ‘colleagues’, you might just find yourself cleaning the office loo. If you can transform their mind-numbingly dull ‘wisdom’ into something remotely useful, you might just crawl out of the career dumpster you’re currently festering in. And for God’s sake, at least pretend you’re listening! And here’s a lucky charm for you, sweetheart. It’s a golden paperclip. Why? Because it’s about as useful as your current skill set, but at least it might help you hold your life together. Now, isn’t that a hoot?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!