Oi, you’ve got more on your plate than a fat bloke at an all-you-can-eat buffet, haven’t ya? You’re staggering about like a one-legged pigeon, wondering how you’re going to juggle all these flaming responsibilities. Well, here’s a thought, love: why not bother your mates and office cronies for a bit of help? You know, those plonkers you spend half your life avoiding at the pub. Dealing with these mind-boggling tasks ain’t half as bad when you’ve got some poor sods to share the misery with. Remember, love: many hands make the work lighter… or at least make it look like you’re not the only one cocking it up. As for your lucky charm, it’s an old pair of socks that you’ve been avoiding washing for weeks. Yes, they stand up on their own and could probably walk out the door if they tried, but they’re ‘lucky’, alright. Just remember not to wear them on a hot date…unless you’re trying to escape by knocking ’em out cold.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!