Blimey, mate, there’s some right dodgy business going on here. Seems like your bubble’s about to be burst, those secret truths are popping up like zits on a teenager’s face. You’ve been looking at some bigwig as if they’re the bees knees, but let me tell you, they ain’t the Queen, love. This little escapade of yours is like a slap in the face with a wet fish, reminding you that having a goggle at successful people is all fun and games until you remember they’re just as human as you and me. Remember, even the Pope has to pull his pants up one leg at a time. And here’s your lucky charm: a gilded horseshoe. But don’t you go thinking it’ll do you any good. It’s just as likely to give you tetanus as it is to bring you luck. So, good luck with that, darling.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!