Cor blimey, love, it’s bloody difficult to tell the difference between some old codswallop and a proper chinwag, innit? Now, it’s all well and good to have a natter about the local shenanigans, but heaven help the poor sod who has a pop at your kin. Might just make you want to keep your gob shut about others altogether, eh? Lucky phrase for you: “Duck and dive.” Use it when the gossip gets too hot, and you’ll avoid a right kerfuffle. Mind you, if the “duck and dive” doesn’t work, a swift knee to the groin usually does the trick!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!