Darling, don’t let the riff-raff bully you into submission just to keep their mugs grinning. Instead of bending over backwards, why not suggest a half-way house that won’t leave you feeling like you’ve been thrown under the double-decker? And for God’s sake, when it comes to signing your life away on the dotted line, make sure you’re not walking blindly into a pit of vipers, or worse, a tax audit. Now, your lucky charm for the day is a signed Joan Rivers autobiography. Not only will it give you a laugh, it might even help you develop a backbone. And remember, darling, the only thing you should be signing blind is a divorce settlement!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!