Alright, mate, keep your peepers peeled for the flapping limbs and twitchy eyebrows of your so-called pals. Chatting is more than just wagging your jaw and spouting bollocks. If some twit can’t look you in the eye and they’re squirming about like a dog on hot concrete, they’re likely bored out of their skull or just couldn’t give a toss about what you’re on about. And your lucky charm? A right pair of knickers – preferably clean. Why? Because with your knack for reading people, you’re going to need all the luck you can get to avoid being given the cold shoulder!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!