Don’t go judging a bloke by his cravat, darling. Your spectacles might be a bit skewed. You need to give the old grey matter a workout and take a butcher’s from every conceivable vantage point. Some eager beaver is gagging for a pronto response to their harebrained scheme. Do us a favour, love, don’t go making any grand declarations before you’ve had a proper squizz at the whole palaver. Your lucky charm, darling, is a squashed penny you found on the pavement. Keep it handy and who knows? You might just avoid stepping in the dog’s dinner again!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!