Oi, you lot! Time to pull your head out of the clouds and put on your thinking cap. Yeah, I’m talking about you, darling! You’re about as useful as a chocolate teapot when it comes to planning. It’s not all fairy dust and rainbows, you know. You need a bit of common sense mixed in with your wild fantasies. I mean, sure, go ahead and start knitting unicorn jumpers or whatever tickles your fancy. Just don’t come crying to me when you realise glitter yarn costs more than your last holiday. And here’s your lucky break: A silver thimble. Yeah, not exactly a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, is it? But it might just save you from stabbing your finger while you’re making those ridiculous jumpers. Just don’t try to use it as a shot glass, you absolute muppet.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!