Feeling like a lone sausage at a vegan barbecue, are we? Well, stop your bellyaching! You’re not the only one bobbing about in this sea of misery. In fact, there’s a whole flotilla of us. So pull up your knickers, grab those weepy emotions by the scruff and give ’em a good shake. Spend your time indulging in whatever tickles your fancy – whether it’s knitting miniature sweaters for squirrels or singing Celine Dion songs to your cactus. And if you really want to cheer up, do something nice for someone else. Maybe gift your neighbour that dead plant you’ve been neglecting. It’ll make their garden look better in comparison. Lucky tip: They say a bird in the hand is better than two in the bush. But frankly, I think it’s more about the size of your bush. So trim it, darling!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!