Apparently, there’s a gaggle of numpties out there who reckon you’re some sort of miracle-worker, conveniently forgetting that you’re already working your arse off, trying to keep everyone happy as a pig in muck. Bollocks to keeping a stiff upper lip! If you reckon you’re being taken for a ride, don’t be shy about it. Let the cat out of the bag and burst their blissful ignorance like a cheap balloon at a kid’s party. Lucky charm: A horseshoe. Why? Well, if things go south, you can always try to clout the numpties over the head with it. Works a treat every time!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!