There’s a poor soul out there that needs your help, but they’re not gonna hang out a blinking sign, are they? So, pull your head out of your arse and take a gander around. And don’t start going on about dosh, because I’ll tell you now, it ain’t everything. You can’t buy love, friendship, or a decent pint for that matter. So, stop counting your pennies and start counting on your mates instead. And if you think the world’s going round because of your bank balance, you’re more off your rocker than a one-legged duck in a whirlpool! Your lucky phrase this week is “Pound foolish.” That’s right, you tightwad. Next time you’re about to grumble about splitting the bill, remember, you could be saving a quid but losing a mate. And in the grand scheme of things, which is more valuable? That’s a rhetorical question, you numpty!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!