Today ain’t the day to chinwag with your old ball ‘n chain or your tight mate. At first, they might be all puffed up, cheering you on like you’re the Queen herself. But it won’t be long before they’re acting like a backseat driver on a roundabout, trying to steer every bit of your life. They’ll be on you like a rash, controlling every bloomin’ thing you do. Just remember, they ain’t your puppet master and you ain’t their Punch and Judy. Lucky charm for today: A teabag. Yes, you heard me right. Because even when things are in hot water, it still manages to make things better. Plus, you can always chuck it at the aforementioned control freak if they get too cheeky.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!