f you’ve been feeling like a dog chasing its tail, it’s high time you took a breather, old chap! Choose activities that help you relax and unwind, perhaps a spot of tiddlywinks or a marathon session of Monty Python reruns. If you’re stuck with responsibilities you can’t shake off, like that fine old British tradition of queuing, fret not! Help is on its way, probably in the form of a stiff drink or a cheeky chippy. New resources are at your disposal, so stop moaning like a weather-worn scarecrow and get cracking! Something exciting will happen in the evening, so stop twiddling your thumbs. It could be anything from a racy episode of Eastenders to a blackout from unpaid electricity bills. Just prepare yourself for a powerful emotional boost, possibly comparable to the shock of finding out that the Queen isn’t actually immortal. Lucky Charm: A pint of stout. Yes, I know it’s not exactly a four-leaf clover, but it’s infinitely more satisfying and it’ll probably help you forget your troubles. Now that’s what I call a real British charm!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!