Listen up, sunshine! Your knickers are in a twist over all those tiresome issues you’ve been brushing under the carpet like they’re crumbs from last week’s fish and chips. We’re talking about those delightful topics like inheritance, insurance bollocks, what you owe to that dodgy bloke down the pub, and those joint arrangements you made when you were three sheets to the wind. So, pull your finger out, take a break from watching telly and get your arse in gear to sort out these muddles. I know, darling, it’s about as entertaining as watching paint dry. But after you’ve done your adulting for the day, you can look forward to an evening as light and frothy as a drag queen’s tutu. Lucky charm: A four-leaf clover. Yes, it’s cliche, but so is your life, darling. Might as well embrace it.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!