Blimey, stop faffing about like a headless chicken! Only throw your hat in the ring if you’ve mulled it over like a fine wine and you’re as certain as a Brit in a queue that you’re not just pulling a decision out of your arse. The last thing you want is to risk your life’s collection of tea bags and crumpets. If you have the choice, and let’s be honest, you probably don’t, put stability at the top of your list, like it’s the last biscuit in the tin. Now, for a bit of luck, try wearing green undies. Not sure if it’s the colour or the thrill of potential exposure that brings fortune, but who cares? It’s a laugh, ain’t it?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!