You’ve got a twitch in your britches for something new, haven’t you? Why not collar a couple of your old muckers and set off on a right old knees-up to find something that’ll give you a tickle? Could be scarpering off to some far-flung eatery that serves up grub you can’t even pronounce, or maybe catching a flick that needs subtitles, because let’s face it, you can’t understand the Queen’s English at the best of times. Or, if you’re feeling particularly adventurous, simply chuck yourself into the motor and leg it to the middle of nowhere. Just remember, if you do end up in a field of sheep, it’s not Glastonbury, darling. Here’s your lucky charm: A paperclip. Don’t laugh, you ungrateful wretch. It’s more useful than you might think! Plus, it’s the only thing you’re likely to bend into shape this week without pulling a muscle.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!