You’ve been clinging onto your old routines like a Tory to a tax cut. You’ve been moaning about it so much, even the Queen’s corgis could hear you. But, look at you now, you’re embracing these newfangled ways like a randy teenager at a house party. Turns out, these changes were about as overdue as your library book from 1997. Your lucky phrase for today is “Bob’s your uncle,” which, considering your shocking family tree, he probably is. So, next time you’re stuck in a pickle, just remember – Bob’s your uncle, and hopefully, he’s not your cousin too.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!