Blimey, you’ve finally managed to do something worth a toss from your childhood wish list! It’s a true miracle, you’d have a better chance of spotting the Queen doing the Macarena! You knew there were a few naysayers, those who thought your dreams were as useful as a chocolate teapot. Well, now you’ve made them eat their words, haven’t you? Go ahead, pop the bubbly, chuck a sickie, celebrate like you’ve just discovered a new way to spell ‘Brexit’! And here’s a little nugget of luck for you: Your lucky charm is a rubber duck. Yep, you heard right. A rubber duck. Why? Well, why not? It’s not as if your life can get any more absurd, can it?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!