Blimey, darling, brace yourself for a blast from the past that’ll knock your socks off! It’s going to be as poignant as a soap opera rerun, dredging up memories you’d rather forget. Think of it as a trip down memory lane, only you accidentally stumbled into the wrong alley. You’ll be swamped by memories of old chums, long-lost relatives and those colleagues you secretly wished would be abducted by aliens. And then, out of the blue, a reminder of some old codger you haven’t seen in yonks will hit you like a double-decker bus. Get ready for emotions so powerful, they could power the London Eye! Lucky for you, the colour of the day is purple. So, slap on that hideous and violently violet jumper your Aunt Edna knitted you and strut your stuff. Who knows? It might even keep the ghosts of the past at bay!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!