Sit yourself down and chew the fat about your work life, mate. Been having wet dreams about swanning off into a spanking new job role? Well, this is your golden ticket, so pull your finger out and get cracking. Mind you, if you’re content to linger on in your old boring job like a bad fart, then you’d best start thinking about how to shimmy up that greasy pole of a career ladder. Lucky phrase for you: “Every dog has its day.” And in your case, the dog might need a bloody good bath first!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!