Blimey, your feelings have grabbed you by the knackers, and now you’re as clueless as a choccy teapot in a hot oven about what you’re really chasing in this circus we call life. If you’re gunning for a bit of the ol’ peace and prosperity, you’re gonna have to put in some elbow grease into this thing called self-improvement. It’s about time you got stuck into your fears and anxieties, rather than stuffing your face with those biscuits and pretending they’re the answer to all your problems. So, pull up your socks, put on your thinking cap and give your situation a good, hard look. As for your lucky charm, it’s a mirror. Nothing quite like seeing your own horrified expression when you realise you’ve run out of biscuits. It’s a good reminder to stop munching and start doing something productive with your life.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!