Your lover or business chum is like a compass that’s lost its North – still blabbering on but somehow keeping you on the straight and narrow. When the chips are down, they’re like a jester on steroids, grinning and cheering you up. You, on the other hand, are their knight in shining armour, or more realistically, their knight in rusty tin foil, providing a shoulder or a pint when they need it. This strange symbiosis is a bit like a couple of old socks in a washing machine – battered about but still clinging together. Your lucky phrase for the day is “I’d rather be lucky than good.” It’s a corker, isn’t it? It’s like saying “I’d rather be a one-legged duck than a three-legged squirrel.” Think about it – it’s nuts, but it might just be your golden ticket… or at least a ticket to the pub.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!