Keeping your noggin on the grindstone is like pulling teeth from a rabid badger, innit? Your brain keeps buggering off to the realm of “what-ifs” and “oh shites”, making your job as focused as a one-eyed pigeon in a hurricane. How about you tell your duties to do one and prance off for a bit of fresh air? It’s not skiving, it’s strategic retreat! Leave the muck to stew today and get back to it tomorrow when your perspective’s as fresh as a daisy in a dog turd. Lucky phrase for you: “Every cloud has a silver lining.” But remember, you pillock, it’s not actual silver. Don’t go getting any ideas about nicking clouds.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!