You know, you and your other half are about as close as two ships passing in the night, whilst wearing blindfolds, on a foggy Tuesday. Now, I’m not saying you’re drifting apart but if this were the film Titanic, you’d be on different icebergs. It’s time to pull your finger out and sort this mess while there’s still a glimmer of hope. Ignoring it, you’ll soon be like two bald men fighting over a comb – pointless. So, if you don’t fancy a solo Netflix binge, put this relationship at the top of your to-do list, right above ‘buy more teabags’. Lucky charm for the day is a four-leaf clover. Or in your case, a four-leaf “clover the hell are you doing with your life”. It’s as rare as a decent joke at a clown convention, but lord knows, you need all the luck you can get.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!