Blimey! No matter how much of a practical Percy you try to be, it’s always the flights of fancy that tickle your pickle in any job. So, get your head out of the grey clouds and let your imagination do the hokey pokey. Give someone a nudge and tell ’em how much they mean to you. Not in a soppy way, but like they’re the last pint in the pub and you’ve got a thirst only they can quench. It’ll do wonders for your relations, or at least it’ll give ’em a good shock. Now, for your lucky charm: it’s a cucumber. Don’t ask why, just go with it. Remember, it’s not the size that counts; it’s how you use it. Now, off you trot and stop bothering me.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!