Well, love, it’s about bloody time you let go of that thing you’ve been mulling over and on about, like a dog with a bone, isn’t it? You’ve given it more thought than a Kardashian gives to their next selfie, so it’s time to chuck it in the bin and focus on something a bit more cheerful, like that half-price bottle of gin in the cupboard. And as for those self-proclaimed ‘experts’, they’re about as useful as a chocolate teapot, so tell ’em to stuff it. Everything’s going to be tickety-boo, so no need to get your knickers in a twist. And here’s a bit of luck for you: your lucky colour is brown. Yes, brown – the colour of mud, poo and that dodgy gravy your Auntie Marge makes every Christmas. So, slap on a brown frock and paint the town red – or well, brown, I suppose.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!