Your chums and office comrades will be gobsmacked by your magnetic and side-splitting persona. ‘Course, don’t be taken aback when you find yourself the star of the show, love. Be sure your chinwags are as straight as a dye and sharp as a tack. But toss in a bit of tomfoolery into your yarns, it’ll make ’em stickier than a jam sandwich and coax the others to sit up and take notice. Your lucky phrase for today is “Bob’s your uncle.” Use it to impress your American mates. They’ll think you’re so bloody British it’s like you’ve got the Queen on speed dial!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!