Blimey, you’re nosier than a park pigeon on a chip hunt! There’s something fishy going on, and you’re sniffing around like a basset hound on the scent of a butcher’s shop. For now, keep your gob shut, or you’ll get their knickers in a twist. It’s only a matter of time before the cat’s out of the bag, so just sit tight with your cucumber sandwiches and tea. As for that tantalising travel opportunity, it’s more tempting than a two-for-one deal on gin and tonics at your local pub. But whether you can afford it is another question. You might have to check down the back of the sofa or start shaking your piggy bank, unless you’ve been stashing away the pennies like a squirrel with a nut obsession. And here’s a cheeky tip for you – your lucky number is 13. Yeah, I know, it’s usually considered unlucky, but I reckon it’s about time someone gave it a break. It’s been sat in the corner, crying into its beer for long enough. So, go on, give it a chance. Maybe it’ll surprise you and turn out to be the best bloody thing you ever did. Or not. But hey, life’s a gamble, innit?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!