You’re as good at hiding your feelings as the Queen is at cracking a smile, but right now, the stars are telling you to let it all hang out. No need for a chinwag that lasts as long as a cricket match, though. If you and a workmate are at sixes and sevens, chances are you’re just getting your knickers in a twist over nowt. It’s a bit like finding out the Loch Ness Monster was just a very ambitious swan, innit? Your luck’s in this week, darling. Your lucky charm is a Union Jack thong – not the most comfortable thing in the world, but it’ll get people talking. Just make sure you wear it on the inside, unless you’re trying to scare off the crows.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!