Oi, you’re up to your neck in it, ain’t ya? I’d suggest putting the kibosh on any big decisions for now, love. You’ve got more on your plate than a fat bloke at a pie-eating contest, so it’s hardly the time to be pondering important choices about your welfare. Your judgement’s about as spot-on as a blind darts player at the moment, so best to leave it, eh? And for your little slice of luck, try this: your lucky number’s 7. But don’t get too excited, it’s only lucky if you’re counting the number of times you can fail before getting something right. Keep count, it’s a right laugh!

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!